Julie: See www.gfcfdiet.com for help with avoiding gluten AND casein. That site lists acceptable and unsafe foods for gluten/casein free diets. Since I must avoid soy and some artificial sweetners (sorbitol/mannitol/xylitol) as well as gluten/casein, I have learned to just read labels, call and/or email food manufacturers to explain mystery terms on their ingredients and use gluten-free/CF lists only as a starting point in my decision to choose a food. I have discovered a large variety of safe foods within those restrictions, so I don't feel deprived at all.
I just recently returned from a vacation where I successfully negotiated gluten-free/cf/sf 'safe' meals in 6 different restaurants. Rather than try to explain about celiac disease or food intolerances, I studied their menus and requested entrees with simply grilled meats and steamed vegies. Most restaurants have at least one entree that approximates that or can be prepared without additional (unsafe) sauces or coatings. Then I would explain that I must avoid wheat, dairy and soy and ask that none of those ingredients be used to prepare my entree. Since I was in San Diego, ordering in Mexican restaurants was the easiest ... corn, rice, beans, guacamole, corn tortillas and chips (IF fried in dedicated fryers), meats are all gluten-free/CF. I only had to request they omit the cheese. (I also avoid hot, spicy sauce.)
I know consuming gluten/casein/soy/sorbitol will give me excruciatingly painful symptoms, so PAIN motivates me not to 'cheat'. Besides I would only be cheating myself. I view pain causing ingredients as 'unsafe' and all other foods as 'safe' rather than bad or good foods. If I accidentally consume an unsafe ingredient, I'm not 'bad', just sad that I exposed my poor body to more damage and scared about how long the pain will last this time.
Celiac Disease is correlated with many autoimmune diseases, so doing everything you can to avoid gluten/dairy may relieve much of the symptoms associated with epilepsy and lupus. Focus on how much better you will feel without gluten/dairy containing foods, rather than on foods you are giving up. Also focus on the variety of healthy foods you CAN eat.
BURDEE